So we’ve come full circle. Little did I know on this day one year ago, when I wrote a few lines about Abigail’s first day off school, that I would end up writing a rambling diary on and off for another twelve months. There’s also some more things I wished I had known on this day one year ago.
1. Forget pasta and toilet roll. Buy fence paint. There will be freakishly hot weather for a while and you’ll need months to do that fence. But there will be none for miles. So buy twenty mahoosive tins of the stuff.
2. For God’s sake, Lindsay . This is your one chance to get on top of things. Don’t faff about writing drivel. Sort out insurance, tidy the loft, clean the skirting boards, categorise the photos. You will never get this time again.
3. Follow more unknown paths. You’ve made discoveries in your jaunts with Frankie. Stop with the familiar. Dare to try the unknown. You’ll feel better for it.
4. Write about this time. It’s a unique time in history and you’re witnessing it first hand. Oh, you did. OK. Forget that one then.
5. In fact, forget that daily detritus. Go for the book. Don’t authors lock themselves away for months so they can write uninterrupted? Only you could not see that this was the perfect time. Even with your glasses on.
6. Don’t knock a window out the day before Boris announces Lockdown 1, leaving you with missing skirting boards, unpainted walls and a gap in the floor for months. Then don’t take the fireplace out the day before Boris announces Lockdown 2, leaving a gaping hole in the wall. And no, you won’t be able to escape through it.
7. Put your husband on a diet. Otherwise, his knackered spine through crap core muscles will pinch a leg nerve, giving him sciatica for months so that you’re on dog walking duties. Wasting hours trying to tire the creature out when you could have been cleaning blinds.
8. That money you’re saving from not buying petrol, school bus fees, dance lessons etc – save it!! Don’t just spend it because it’s there!
9. Learn a new skill. Embrace the time. You always wanted to learn Spanish. Maybe learn how to parent.
10. Actually, forget about following new paths. Whenever you did, you got lost or fell over. Just follow the dog. Did he ever get wet or muddied up?! OK. Fair point. Well, maybe just don’t leave the house.
And here’s where it all began – Day One