Day Sixty-Five in Lockdown #3.0

07:42 Lindsay has clearly forgotten how to get ready for work. With three minutes to spare, her hair is wet and she can’t fasten her pants. And she has more chance of drying her hair in three minutes than fastening her pants.

08:16 Lindsay’s colleague asks if she’s happy to be back.


Lindsay thinks she was maybe meant to lie at that point.

09:36 Lindsay’s Apple Watch thinks she may have been kidnapped. She appears to be moving on a regular basis for the first time since December 18th.

11:04 Lindsay’s kidneys are having a good day. No endless cups of tea causing increased blood flow and stress. Lindsay meanwhile is turning a darker shade of red by the minute and clearly needs a cup of tea to reduce her stress.

11:46 There’s too much talking in the room. Lindsay’s looking round for the Mute All button.

13:38 Lindsay’s class are watching a clip of Jacques Cousteau exploring a shipwreck.

“It’s dark down there Miss. It’s quite scary.”

“Yeah, it is Miss. It reminds me of George.”

“Who’s George?”

“You know? It’s a film. About a shark.”


“Yeah, he has big jaws.”

“Who does?”


15:36 Lindsay races upstairs and apologises to her stomach by putting on a pair of loose fitting joggers.

16:23 Ian and Lindsay both have bad heads.

“Do you want some Ibuprofen Ian?”

“No. I think mine’s a dehydrated bad head.”

“I don’t think Ibuprofen discriminates against different types of bad heads.”

17:12 Joel thinks he deserves a treat.

“Can we have a McDonalds tomorrow Mam?”


“Why only maybe?”

“Because your dad is in the room. When he leaves, it will be definitely.”

19:01 Ian and Lindsay are watching a repeat of The Repair Shop.

“What could we send in Linz to be completely repaired?”

“Oooh, your back! No. Joel!”


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