07:02 Lindsay gets up.

07:04 Lindsay remembers it’s half term. FFS.

09:36 Ian wishes he hadn’t got up.

“I’ve still got a bad head Ian. I think it’s all the worry about DS Arnott on Line of Duty.”

10:36 Abigail’s looking at things for her new room.

“I like this clock but it’s £40.”

“You’ve got plenty of money from your birthday or Christmas.”

“Yeah but that’s not for clocks!”

11:06 One of Lindsay’s students messages and asks if he can read to her. Lindsay thinks somebody’s parent might have had enough already after 2 hours and six minutes of half term.

11:53 Lindsay’s going mad, tidying the living room.

“What are you doing? It’s not like anyone is coming round.”

“Abigail’s got a dance workshop. A famous dancer will be looking into our living room.”

“What’s he called?”

“No idea.”

12:01 Lindsay’s now telling Ian what she plans to do in the kitchen with his wage.

“So, I’ve bought two new Scentsy warmers…”

Ian rolls his eyes.

“Why are you laughing?”

“This is not the face of a man who is laughing.”

“They were on offer. Too good to refuse.”

“So free then?”

“No. Not that good.”

12:17 Lindsay’s confused why her plant stand still has the label on. She goes to cut it off, only to discover it’s a cobweb.

13:32 Lindsay’s making arrangements.

“What time are you working on Wednesday Ian?”

“Day shift.”

Lindsay schedules her next parcel to be delivered in two days time.

14:01 Lindsay falls asleep.

“Dad! Mam needs rebooted again!”

14:31 Ian leaves for work. Lindsay can’t decide if he’s going to drive trains or rob a bank.

15:16 Ian phones Lindsay.

“You haven’t got Covid.”

“Why?”

“Because I’ve just been tested and I don’t have it.”

“Yeah but I always try to stay 2 metres away from you. So I still could have.”

16:46 “Mam. Why have you put ibuprofen and paracetamol in the fruit bowl?”

“Because since this lockdown started, they’ve been part of my five a day.”

17:01 Lindsay discovers that not only does she always make enough pasta for the entire street, she now produces gravy thick enough to fix any potholes in the road.

18:09 Joel asks Lindsay how she is feeling.

“I’ve still got a bad head.”

Joel taps his mother on the head.

“Oh thanks Joel. Now I’m cured!”