Day Twenty-Nine in Lockdown #3.0

08:05 Abigail emerges at a reasonable time for the second day in a row.

“Do you know about Captain Tom Abigail?”


“He’s died.”

“Yeah I know.”

“But I just asked if you know about him and you said no.”

“Yeah. I don’t know him.”

“But I didn’t ask that!”

Lindsay spent October trying to persuade Boris to shut schools. She now feels she needs to do the reverse.

09:21 Abigail needs help.

“Does she-en need a capital letter?”

“What’s she-en?”

“You know. She-en.”

“Is it a person’s name?”

“No. It’s French for dog…..Where are you going?”

“I need to write to Boris!”

09:54 Lindsay’s looking at an array of her pupil’s profile pictures and talking to herself. She’s trying to look at the irony of the situation. She spent the autumn term telling her class to be quiet. And now they are.

10:03 Lindsay’s exasperated and leaves the lesson.

10:05 She rejoins.

“Did you have computer problems Miss?”

“Yeah. That’s what we’ll call it.”

12:22 Lindsay reads another Facebook memory about a quiet Joel flooding the bathroom. Joel’s quiet.

“Joel!!! What are you doing?!”

“Nothing. Why?”

“Are you in the bathroom?”


“Are you in possession of any eggs, Sudocrem or baby oil?”


“Ok. As you were.”

14:48 Lindsay’s fighting a losing battle.

“Ok. I just need to pop out a minute.”

“Where are you going Miss?”

“I need to unpost a letter to Boris!”

16:01 Lindsay just wants the day to end. Ian suggests she has a drink.

“I can’t. It’s only 4 o’ oh go on then.”

17:12 Joel creeps up behind Lindsay and asks for help with German. She moves her chair back into his unprotected zone. Joel screams in pain.

“I think you’ll find that was Anglo-Saxon you were screaming there Joel, not German.”

19:23 Ian’s tired from a hard day of not driving trains.

“I’m off to bed.”

“This early?”

“It’s gonna take me half an hour to take all those pointless cushions off the bed!”

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