Day Twenty-Five in Lockdown #3.0

08:56 Ian and Lindsay are listening to the wind outside.

“Linz. You take Frankie for a walk.”

“You want your wife to go out in that? I could end up in Munchkin Land?”

“Your point being?”

09:03 Lindsay is making Frankie warm Weetabix for breakfast. Lindsay realises Frankie doesn’t have owners. He has staff.

09:27 Lindsay smells from downstairs that she should really wait a while before she goes to clean her teeth.

09:32 Lindsay may need to edit Sam’s personal statement. He sounds like Liam Neeson with his very particular set of skills.

09:52 A letter arrives from Social Care for the parents of Fruit Loop. They addressed him as Joel. Lindsay panics that they may have read her blog.

10:48 Ian rolls his eyes as he spies Lindsay opening yet another parcel.

“What have you bought now?”

“It’s actually salvaged photo frames.”

“Salvaged from where?”

“Next.”

10:59 Lindsay plucks up the courage to open the envelope. Joel’s been invited to take part in a COVID-19 testing research study. Lindsay had hoped it would be a study on the workings of his mind, but she’ll settle for sticking a swab up his nose instead.

12:03 Ian’s been put in charge of lunch.

“It’s burnt Ian.”

“It looks like you cooked it. I just assumed that’s how you liked food.”

14:57 Sam and Ian pop out. Lindsay reassures them that she’ll work on Sam’s application.

14:58 Lindsay is lying on her bed, eating pepparami and googling how to pronounce her favourite flower.

16:04 Joel announces he might apply for an apprenticeship.

“Who should I put down as a reference?”

“The teacher who hates you the least.”

18:56 Lindsay wonders when her life changed so much that the highlight of her Saturday evening would be watching C-List celebrities singing in weird costumes or spinning on a giant wheel.

18:59 Ian informs Lindsay that ‘The Wheel’ isn’t on tonight.

“Nooooooooooooooooo!”

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