(No one actually has it)

03:56 Lindsay is lying awake and not for once because of Ian’s snoring. The full reality of the situation has hit her and she’s at a complete loss.
07:30 Joel has to be wrestled from his bed as he doesn’t see the point in going into school for two days. Lindsay slams dunk him to the ground, exclaiming that she needs these final two days to prepare herself mentally and physically for the Joel months ahead.
07:34 Lindsay breathes a sigh of relief that Sam is not doing his GCSEs this year. If they’re based on mock exams, Sam would have been in a creek without a paddle!
07:35 Lindsay becomes angry when Sam informs her that this year’s GCSEs will be based on target grades and his were all higher than he actually got.
11:59 Lindsay curses the entire human race as she cuts herself on a piece of glass from the vase which smashed as she was tidying the big kitchen cupboard. This wouldn’t have happened in the pre-Corona days (cleaning cupboard that is, not bleeding).
13:19 In her boredom, Abigail finds a musical Christmas decoration and plays Jingle Bells in her room for the next ten minutes.
15:34 First World Problems. Lindsay can’t use the fingerprint ID on her phone or iPad. She has a plaster on her poorly thumb and is having to actually type in her passcode. The world is going mad.
16:35 Joel makes everyone laugh when he announces he’s going to do five hours of schoolwork everyday from Monday.
17:02 Lindsay is thoroughly delighted when an email arrives saying the direct debit for the school bus will be cancelled temporarily, saving her £275 a month.
17:03 Lindsay realises that she’ll probably need that £275 a month now to purchase alcohol to survive parenting and homeschooling her children 24/7.

Read what happened yesterday on Day 1