07:02 Lindsay’s chuffed she’s managed to sleep past half past six.

07:03 Feck! Clocks have gone forward. In theory, she’s woken up even earlier on the day she’s losing an hour’s sleep!

07:04 Lindsay groans as she remembers all the clocks she’ll have to forget to change over the next six months.

07:05 Lindsay smiles when she realises her car clock will now be correct, having been on British Summer Time all year.

08:36 Lindsay’s phone is now correcting words to one of her student’s names. Phones do listen. To words Lindsay shouts a lot.

12:02 Current GCSE American and British History student Joel spots Winston Churchill on the telly.

“I know him. It’s Herbert Hoover.”

“It isn’t. It’s Winston Churchill.”

“Same thing.”

“No it’s not. One was president of America, the other prime minister of Britain.”

“Yeah, but both during the war.”

“No. Herbert Hoover was in the Thirties, Churchill was during the war.”

“Yeah, but both were bald.”

“No. Hoover had hair.”

“Yeah, but both were men.”

“Correct!!”

14:23 Lindsay overdoes it with the dry shampoo and ends up looking like Miss Havisham. Ian is amused.

“Jesus. Is this what I’ve got to look forward to?”

“No, she was unhappily unmarried. I would be happily unmarried.”

15:47 Lindsay changes the oven clock because it’s one she can actually reach. She doesn’t even need to Google how to do it. This deserves a public announcement.

“I’ve changed the oven clock all by myself.”

Silence.

17:23 Lindsay is reading out the pizza order to Ian.

“I’m tuna, Joel is ham and you are special.”

“Aww, thanks.”

“Special has another meaning.”